Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Mother

I have always wondered why I always think the way I do. Too negative, too much pessimism. My view with the world is much lopsided, obscured and self-centered.

I always think of myself first, my comfort and my way. ME ME ME. Whenever I get into that ME mode, there's always this one person who comes every time and correct me. Or maybe I should say, enlighten me as always.

She always sees the lighter side of things and me of course the dark one.

I wonder how she does it all. Being a mom, a friend, a sister, and sometimes a father. At other weird times, she needs to be the enemy for good measure.

In my teenage years, I can't appreciate everything that she did for me. I was always jealous. Envious of the attention. Always thinking, always scheming. A real rebel by definition.

I always wanted to go the different way. I wanted to be different, bold and daring.

Now, in my current status, I realized how hard everything must have been for her. How I made our lives, not to mention relationship hell to cope up with. I now understand everything that she did, why it must have been that way. Maybe it wasn't the best way, but I couldn't trade it to any other anyway.

I still have much to learn from her. To be forgiving is at the top of the list, to be generous, to learn how to share, to care and really mean it. And maybe, just be a mom.

This is to tell her that I really appreciate everything that she did for me. Thank You Toni.

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